Accidentally on purpose..

Was nice hearing from my friends that liked my silliness of this blog!  Thanks your support means a lot to me...  Winter is coming let the boring begin, so that means we will be having to set up a dart game here and there.  Hell that is another thing I gave up I love.  Always was fun getting the group together and throwing darts on a snowy Saturday afternoon.  But first have to make it through these 24 days of this diet I am doing.  I accidentally on purpose forgot that gawd awful fiber drink. I would rather eat carpet then drink that again!!!!  I will find fiber else where thank you very much...  I had dreams last night that that Anabelle (that new scary movie with a possessed doll) was chasing me to make me drink that fiber drink..  Oh my!!! To break up the winter blues in February going to Vegas again, Theresa the 6-9th I am telling you ahead a time so you can meet us early in the day instead after we drank all day and Tim wants to go to bed.  Kelli sure hope you can drive in and maybe stay this time and hang out too!  Vegas has become an annual trip, it is the Month Tim and Laurie's dad died also my beloved Father in Law so we go in celebration of life and fun.  Anyone who wants to join us is welcome.  Friday thru a  Monday is a good amount of time for Vegas after that you are to beat to do anything else but sleep on a plane home!  Well enough of my rambling!  Good day to all! mwah!

Feeling Inspired....

I haven't written here for so long it seems odd, but I got an enthusiastic nudge inside my head to write once again.  I disappeared off the radar for a while, went through a funk you know one of those funks where you don't enjoy things you use to and fall a bit in depths of self pity, unhappiness and a darkness where I just wasn't caring.  Then one day you have to wake up and say hmmmm what the hell am I doing?! It actually took a couple of people to drive me to the realization I wasn't being who I once was and that gave me the idea that I needed help from some of those happy pills.  I always thought it would be admitting I was a failure to do that, but it was actually reaching out for help. Those lil white pills have really brought me out of the darkness and have me feeling reacquainted with me again.  Some might wonder why the slip in a funk?  Well I have never been good with change.  I am stubborn and a definitely set in my ways...  I think that is a Gemini trait so blame my mother for popping me out in May!  So on with what made me slip... Let's see my Mother and Father divorced (that lead to a spiraling of some wicked things in itself), My two best friends DD and Kelly ended their relationship (they seem happy and healed now), Another Best friend Theresa broke up with my dear friend Sean (they both seem happy once again), My Grandmother and Grandfather died months apart from each other, Dorie and I pulled away from each other through a incident that got out of hand (if you're wondering we have made peace and moved on from that), Tim's Father died (which I felt he was mine as well), and my childhood best friend Delicia's son died by a freak accident, and last but not least my daughters grew up and left to be on their own.  They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.  Well I believe that is accurate but as a human I got stuck in sorrow and sadness and didn't want to deal with all the changes seemingly to happen all at once. I guess then came today and this epiphany that this is something I use to enjoy and love and why not start writing about new journeys! So as my new beginning of feeling better I jumped on the scale..  Well I was laughing at myself because with depression sometimes follows a fat ass, which in my case I think I got a double dose of that!  With that being said I decided to start a diet with Michael he has had great success with and was doing his second round and I said I would do it too!  So my enthusiastic mind thought hmmm I should complete a diary on my personal journey going through my mental and physical change back to myself once again, and so with that here I am.

So Day one of the diet journey...  I been emailing Michael all day bugging the hell out of the poor guy with my questions and my complaints and he has been a real trooper.  I don't think he knew when I started this journey he was going to be my mentor but I think he is slowly finding that out.  Starting this diet includes going through a 10 day cleansing process, I looked at all the things to start my day and thought easy enough.  I drank the fruity drink like it said 30 minutes before my breakfast and it was actually good, then it said to drink a fiber drink and water I was like hmmmm what is that?  So I emailed my Mentor, Michael and he informs me where to find that drink.  So I eat my snack and figure no problem do that right after lunch, better late then never right?  Eat my lunch specific to the instruction and then come to work and mix that fiber drink.  OMG like ohhhhh I think I am gonna die drinking this gel like sludge with a grainy feel.  I have to do this for what??  10 days?  Holy Hell is that possible that I can survive it?  Why hasn't this company come around to those yummy looking fiber gummies?  So after almost crying when I weighed myself this morning to laughing at the disgusting fiber drink I will be punishing myself with. I thought Life is Good and I am ready from this day forward to come back to being me.  Life is full of change and sometimes we all have a hard time taking the ups and downs of life but in the end the journey is worth it!  So here I go again!